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Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Not Irish but Don't Care

I loved the strange looks I got while traveling in Ireland when asked if I was Irish.  It is like it is unheard of for someone to travel there who is not Irish.  I wonder how many people lie on St. Patty's Day and say they are Irish.  It is funny to think of how the Irish were treated so poorly when the immigrated to America and now we all want to be Irish.  I don't think anyone is going to stop you from having a good time today if you are not Irish.

This is one of the first St. Patty's Days in many years that I'm not out celebrating.  Why am I not celebrating?  One, I don't go out were I live too afraid of running into people.  Second, I don't really do the whole partying thing anymore so the idea of being surrounded by drunk people sober isn't really appealing. 

I use to drink way too much and St. Patty's Day was always the perfect excuse to get drunk.  I think the difference between why I drink now and why I use to drink have really changed.  Having social anxiety can make being at functions quite challenging.  Sadly I learned pretty quickly that a few drinks took the anxiety away.  I became fun Deanna who came across as far more confident than she truly is.  A few drinks and I was no longer shy or nervous. 

It was actually in Ireland that things started changing.  I'm sure most people thought I was going to go to Ireland and spend the entire trip drunk.  There is one hitch to traveling alone it really isn't safe to get drunk on your own.  So while I was in Ireland I had to learn to socialize without being pissed.  I also started to appreciate beer in a new way.  I came back loving Murphy's and Guinness, I was no longer a Miller Light girl. 

Yes there have been a few times in the last three years that I have drank way too much but it is something I am now aware of.  I really try to limit the amount of alcohol I have not only because it isn't recommend with my depression and medication but because I don't want to use it as a crutch.  I don't want to think that the only way I can make it through a function is with a drink. 

So this St. Patty's Day I will not be drinking way too much Guinness and dancing like a fool.